Doctor Dread

Yesterday was Noah's 15 month check up. Just a routine appointment, no specialists, run of the mill ordinary kids stuff. So why was I freaking out??? Since we moved and have not changed doctors yet, it takes me about 45 minutes to get there. On the ride I went from nervous, to anxious, to almost in a full blown panic.  Would she tell me he is too skinny? Behind in development? Signs of something seriously wrong? I kept pushing these crazy-woman thoughts further and further back into my mind but overall the experience sucked.  Like usual we got good news all around, Noah continues to do well albeit really tiny. But the doctor did make one comment that irked me, and then since I am a nut, overanalyzed and is still overanalyzing a day later. This is how it went :

 Me: We are done with the neurologist now, no more specialists!

Doctor: That is great, now you can get on with your lives

Me: Haha, yeah, until the next baby when I am a worrying mess again

Doctor: :::serious:::, Oh! ( acting very surprised) Your planning on having more children?

Me: well yeah, soon actually...

Doctor: Oh,pause, ok.

Hmmm...does she think I am somehow defective? Am I bad at producing a healthy baby? What the fuck was that supposed to mean??? I ran it by my husband who usually calms my overreactive side down, but he too agreed it was kind of weird. I know I am sensitive, especially when it comes to doctors, Noah, and future children, but seriously...people say that damnedest things!

After the past 15 months, not ever meeting one doctor I like, or actually respect, I feel as if I am doomed from every trusting the medical profession again. As a social worker and a mom it angers me that people become so hardened, so unprofessional, so unfazed- where is the empathy people???

Ok, rant over!