What's the point?

I am still not sure who, if anyone is reading my blog anymore. It's sort of been shoved to the wayside with the excitement of my pregnancy and my life being blissfully drama free these past few months. I was however caught by surprise a few days ago when someone posted a strange comment, stating my posts were full of grief and asking why I blog with people who have lost their children. While I am still very confused at that latter statement, I was taken a bit by the opinion that my posts seem to be from someone who is grieving, because while yes, I did grieve when Noah was born ( flame me if you want but you were never in my shoes), and I still have moments of anger regarding his first year being filled with so much stress and sorrow over the unknown, these days I am so filled with happiness, love and gratitude for my miracle it seems my heart might burst. I have said this before but will recap. Yes, Noah is fine. Yes, all signs point to him being "o.k". But it was not always like this. Giving seizure meds to a newborn, taking him to neurologists and geneticists, worrying that he had some incurable degenerative disease...those posts, they were filled with grief and rightfully so. I got a chance to wake up from my nightmare and believe me I know how lucky we are but that does not make it all go away. I don't know why I feel the need to explain myself, this is my blog, my space to vent....but I just do not like to be judged in this poor light.

:::ahhhh:::::

Which leads me to some feelings that I need to a) leave this blog for good, or b) make it private. Seeing some unpleasant comments left a bad taste in my mouth and left me wondering- who is reading this? I don't post our names but I post my sons first name and his picture. Is that safe? The internet is a crazy thing and I am thinking I may have "leaked" us a little too far. I feel like I put my heart on my sleeve only for someone to laugh at it. Maybe it's time to protect it a little better. Maybe it's the hormones talking, it's just what has been stewing in my mind since last week.

Once this baby is born ( we find out in a month if it's a Tessa or a Kai ( or Mason or Oliver, lol) I will start a new blog, one that's a bit more anonymous and less dramatic...one I wou;dn't cringe at if my mother read =)

Not sure what my point is, or what is was 2 years ago when I started blogging, but I am still glad to have a space to vent....I would call it a judgement free zone but that's not the case, and that's fine since it's public but all in all it's my space and if you don't like me, you don't have to read about my life.