I am a pregnant woman's worst nightmare!

Yesterday I finally got my hair cut. I last went in october and have honestly not had a chance since. I used to take Noah along with me on Monday's ( my day to be a SAHM) but he is too antsy and mobile now to sit still that long. My hubby work's Saturday, Sunday they are closed...and quite frankly judging by my tight pants and my lack of tweezing, I have been letting myself go. 

Finally my hair, or mane, or bush, not sure what descriptions fit best hit an all time low. My hair was borderline unruly. I have really long, curly hair. It was a mess. So I bit the bullet and made an appointment at the salon where I went for my hair and makeup on my wedding day. It's really pricey and although I kind of feel like the 60 bucks I spent on a haircut is a bit ridiculous ( not to mention the 30 bucks I spent on products), it was much needed! 

Your probably wondering how this connects to me being a pregnant woman's worst nightmare...so I will get to my point:

The salon owners daughter cut my hair. She is late 30's ( maybe 40?), was trying to conceive for a really really long time and finally got pregnant about 7 months ago. She was glowing, looked fabulous, and was so excited to talk about the baby. She is a sweetheart and I am really happy for her. The last time she did my hair was for my baby shower when the table's were turned and I was the one 7 months pregnant. I knew the questions were coming, and then BAM the famous  " Everything must have went great for you, how is the baby?"  

I never know how to answer this. Usually I end up spilling the whole thing, gory details and all. Afterwards I usually feel like an ass, like I shared too much information, like I am a basket case. Seeing as this sweet woman is pregnant, happy, naive, and generally care free about the whole birthing process I felt really bad answering her question. I politely stated that everything wasn't ok but that Noah is ok now. Short. Sweet. To the point. Oh! and I threw in the happy ending so I wouldn't upset her. I left out the post partum depression, the horror of the NICU, the geneticist, the neurologist, the toll it took on my marriage and all the other characters and details of my not so fairy tale birthing story.

Of course this wasn't enough. She wanted to hear more about it. I went through the whole " you will be fine, blah blah blah, but she kept pushing. So...I gave her some details. Not enough to make her freak or to make me sound like a nut case but I did feel like a debbie downer when it was all said and done. I feel like I am so negative about motherhood and childbirth, I kind of feel bitter.  I really enjoyed my haircut and my time for myself that the salon provided me, but I left with a sour taste, a lingering feeling of guilt. I love Noah so much and the joy he has given me is immeasurable. However, I still feel that when I describe motherhood, it's not always the nicest description. 

Just another step in the healing process I guess.