I am so happy winter is winding down and in a way I can not fathom that spring is almost here. To say that time is flying would be an understatement.
Last March was the hardest month of my life. Well it is a toss up between November 2007 and March 2008, but I think March takes the cake. March is when at Noah's routine 4 month appointment our pediatrician decided that Noah was too "normal" to have suffered from a hypoxic brain injury and therefore had to have some sort of metabolic syndrome. We were referred to a geneticist and spent the next few months waiting for testing results. Can we say, nightmare??? The sights and smells of early spring have brought it all back. Reflecting on what was and being where we are now is comforting but in a way it brings me a lot of pain to think about what we went through.
I have said it time and time again but 16 months later it still blows my mind that this is the experience I have had being a first time mom. I know it's selfish and I know it could be a lot worse, but geez...it's just not fair!
:::::putting on my big girl pants:::::::
All joking aside I am exhausted. But in the famous words of my husband " if this hadn't happened, surely you would find something to worry about"....very true!
I am just very thankful for a healthy little man, and the fact that it is friday. This week was brutal and I can't wait to have a glass ( or 3) of wine, relax in my jacuzzi tub and put on my frumpy yet heavenly pink robe. Am I 28 or 68?? Some days I am not too sure!
2 comments:
Beautiful photos of Noah -- he looks like such a big boy and so happy! :)
Of course, I can relate to how you're feeling. What helps me (on a good day, at least) is to look at how well Adam is doing & how happy he is. If i can focus on him, as opposed to my worrying about him, it helps ease my anxiety... a little bit, at least.
Oh, please, a frumpy pink robe does not make you 68! You should see me in my beloved grandma nightgown!
Those are such great photos of Noah.
I know what you mea about how progress feels good, but it's hard not to mourn the past. I promise you, that feeling will abate as Noah gets older. I promise. I used to get down, too, about all I'd had to deal with as a first-time mom when my other friends were having the typical experiences. But I never feel that way anymore.
Hope you had a relaxing weekend.
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