Moving passed...

Today I start to move passed this, I "shed" the sac this morning and I am sorry if that is way too much information but I just had to get it out. I am a bit more traumatized and upset than I thought I would be. This may sound insanely insensitive but in the past when I heard about an early miscarriage I thought simply that it shouldn't take too much to move past it. I now feel utterly horrible at even having those thoughts because any miscarriage is an emotional and horrible experience. Passing an embryo no matter how small is passing something that was part of you. One week ago I was making plans for my new years baby and this morning I literally flushed those plans down the toilet.

I am learning through all of these trials and tribulations that are my "parenting experience" that my husband and I are not on the same page. I don't speak of my husband often and never got in to the details of how he reacted  following Noah's birth but let's just say I often feel very alone in my reactions. I am trying to keep hormones and anger out of it and am keeping it as simply, everyone deals with things in a different way. 

So today, after getting my second bloodwork drawn  and with the passing of what was to be,  

I am moving forward. Noah is down for his nap, I am sitting, cuddled with a blanket on my porch, sipping my pinot and about to dig in to my mother's day gift- the Twilight book series. 

We will keep living and learning and enjoying, with a few tears and bitter feelings, but hey, we are only human....

Until next time....